On Thanksgiving we gave spanks for the nude stars who made 2011 great, but now that the turkey’s been carved and the dust has settled (along with all that food in our stomachs), we’re feeling a little less generous. So put on your hiking boots and cock your triggers, gentlemen, because we’re going on a turkey shoot!
What’s a turkey shoot, you ask? A turkey shoot is when you count down the most disappointing nude releases of the year- not necessarily stars at their most covered up, but the movies that led us to believe that they would be full of hot, mouth-watering girl flesh but instead were nothing more than cold, bland turkey:
#5 Straw Dogs
The original Straw Dogs (1971) contained nudity from star Susan George, and the trailer for the 2011 remake promised an experience as intense and brutal as the original. The R rating raised our hopes, as did the MPAA’s warning about “sexual content”in the film, but in the end all we got was man-ass from Alexander Skarsgaard blocking our view of star Kate Bosworth (left). Of course if man-ass is your thing, that’s cool, but you’re on the wrong blog, fella.
#4 One Day
Anne Hathaway set the bar very, very high with her fantastically nude perv-formance in Love and Other Drugs (2010) (left), so we were expecting this Disney princess turned “serious”(ie, nude) actress to blow us away with the romance One Day. We were disappointed to learn the movie was PG-13, but the final blow was discovering that Anne comes within spitting distance of nudity in a scene where she skinny-dips with one hand covering her good parts. Turns out Anne is a lot like a drug dealer- once she’s got you hooked, she just leaves you jonesin’ for more.
What are Mr. Skin’s top three turkeys of 2011? You’ll find a hint in the image at the top of the post, but for the full fowl affair, check out this week’s Mr. Skin Minute, right here at MrSkin.com!
We have a lot to be grateful for as the year draws to a close, but this Thanksgiving we’d like to give special spanks to the nudecomers and nude debuts that helped make 2011 such a MAM-entous year. Some, like Lake Bell and Sarah Silverman, we’ve been eagerly eyeing for years, whole others, like Emilia Clarke and Elizabeth Olsen, came out of nowhere to steal our hard-ons.
How about you, Skin fans? Who’s on your short list of the best nude debuts of 2011? Let us know in the comments, and see more pics after the jump!
We’ve got plenty to give spanks for this week in viral videos, like a kids’ toy that is definitely not for children, a pole-dancing lesson that turns into a catfight, another set of talented twins, and the effete bloodsuckers of Twilight replaced with epic, bikini-clad, lesbian makeout win.
More after the jump!
Jill C. Nelson knows her smut. As the co-author of John Holmes: A Life in Inches, (now in its 2nd Edition and available on Amazon.com) she’s rubbed down every aspect of legendary porn star John Holmes’ life and career- and trust us, that’s a lot of rubbing.
Now Jill’s working on a new XXX opus, Golden Goddesses: 25 Legendary Women of Erotic Films, 1968-1985, for which she’s (sk)interviewed the likes of Marilyn Chambers, Veronica Hart, Juliet Anderson, Georgina Spelvin, and many more.
So we’ve decided to turn the tables on Jill and find out what makes a historian of hardcore tick- and where she scored those obscure 8mm porn loops.
More after the jump!